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The most powerful way humans connect with each other

By now, you’ve probably spent hours upon hours sitting in front of your screens to stay connected to your family, friends and communities.

And it’s getting tiring…

Some days, after being in Zoom meetings and on calls the whole day, the last thing I wanna do is get on another call to connect with the people that matter the most to me.

I am zoomed out!

One of the biggest problems with using Zoom instead of meeting face-to-face, is that we cannot make eye contact with each other.

Have you noticed this, too?

Eye contact is one of the most powerful ways humans connect with each other, so I knew I had to find a way to recreate this for my events on Zoom.

Introducing: The Virtual Eye Gazing Experiment

Here is how it works (and I highly recommend you try this with the groups you are facilitating or with your friends, next time you have a group call):

  • Ask for 3-5 volunteers who will make eye contact with their camera lens (I knew, it’s weird, but just wait for the impact it can create)
  • Play some music through Zoom to set the tone and amplify any emotions that will come up (depending on the mood you are going for, you can choose a movie soundtrack like this one from Gladiator, or a cheesy love song, like this one.)
  • Spotlight your first volunteer and invite them to look at the lens the way they would look at a close friend or a loved one. It helps if they imagine a specific person in their mind.
  • Everyone else will look at them on their screen, and it will seem they look straight at them.
  • Switch through all your volunteers after 15-20 seconds until everyone has gone.
  • Bring everyone back to Gallery View and do a quick debrief. How was this experience for the volunteers? What emotions came up?

Every single time I did this activity, it ended up quite emotional. During a dating event, I even had someone fall in love with a stranger (at least that is what they thought).

It was this activity that made me realize the POWER OF CONNECTION in a virtual space and that it is actually possible to create deeply meaningful, memorable and transformational experiences on Zoom.

  1. If you try this activity, please share back how it goes
  2. And if you want more ideas like this one (and you lead groups and gatherings frequently) then you might be interested in my brand new VIRTUAL FACILITATOR TRAINING that I just announced.

Here is what Annie Frisoli shared with me, right after she signed up:

“You are such a joy and wicked good at your craft. I regard myself as highly skilled facilitator, but you have some really special tips, tricks, and insights that I have been super impressed with!!”

ANNIE FRISOLISpeaker | Trainer | Founder & CEO of Creating Community LLC


In this 5-week VIRTUAL FACILITATOR TRAINING, I will show you that it is possible to engage 5-100 participants on Zoom by creating genuine moments of human connection online.

Jan Keck

Jan Keck

Trainer | Facilitator | Experience Designer · Turning Meetings into Inclusive, Engaging and Memorable Experiences 🙌